my melody of bliss

I will put her above everything else.

I identify her as female, but she is more than gender. She is a mood, a vibe, a light, a feeling, an insight, and an inspiration. A state of fulfilment, bliss, and wholesomeness. A feeling of profoundness and joy simultaneously. She feels like me, like home, like the right moment, the right connection the right everything.

I am looking for her every day. Fanatically. Without her, there will be no light, no breathing no sense and no fun. Her absence casts a shadow which makes my life one long chain of mundane and boring tasks.

I am looking for this eternal melody of bliss. I am searching for this song which will guide me home.

I am looking for it in every street, little lane, marketplace, and shop. I search behind vases and second-hand pictures. It seems to me I see her in colours, in skies, in trees. I believe myself so close to her but when I approach her, she always vanishes. She is the fish I never catch. She is the shade that wonders. She is so full of promise and always close enough to feel her. I am full of faith in her existence. But every time I believe I am her; she slides into darkness, into the next street into the next dream, the next city and man.

I follow every instinct, every slightest breeze of faith and incline in the hope to find her.

Her absence makes me glorify her. I depend on her she is my guiding star my compass.

Panic looms in the room when she is absent. I start to feel lost in the streets, in all these many shops and markets. The world gets dizzy and overwhelming, and I aimlessly wonder in a state of confusion.

My relationship with her defines me. The strength of my faith in her heals me. My confidence in living with her in every moment creates me. My endurance of her absence makes me stronger. My search for her is my dance of life. My songs seduce her my melody of existence. My stories about her are my bible of belief. I saw her, I lived with her, I felt her, she is close.